h/t nakedpastor
I asked what the one word you can't say in church is, and within no time at all had lots of comments that made me go 'wow, you are so right'. This is our collected thoughts. If you want to add any more then please do:
1. I'm in a really bad mood.
2. I'm left wing.
3. I'm 'green'.
4. I'm a feminist.
5. I've had an abortion.
6. I think all this stuff about evil spirits is silly.
7. I masturbate.
8. I'm scared of death because I barely have any faith.
9. I'm scared God doesn't exist.
10. God loves and accepts all including Muslim and gay people.
11. 'Saved'.
12. Women have as big a sex drive as men.
13. As a woman I am not a nurturer and don't want kids.
14. I don't approve of the shallow, anachronistic theology that gets fed to the congregation.
15. I have mental health issues. I'm suicidal. I self-harm. I suffer chronic depression.
16. 'Sorry'.
17. 'Cash'.
18. 'LGBT'
19. 'Now'
20. 'Vicar, is it possible you might be wrong?'
21. I have doubts.I think I would only add 'I've been abused' to the list. I guess we all have some responsibility in breaking the taboos....
12 comments:
Why's it always me who sits next to the oddball?
You're right vicar, this coffee really is as lukewarm as your exegesis on Revelation 3.
It's great this church as met my expectations. It really is as cliquey as people forewarned me it was.
Do all Graham Kendrick songs have to be sung 4 times over, each with mounting ecstatic piety?
Why are members of the congregation slowly raising one hand up. Are they asking permission to go to the toilet?
No my contribution didn't make a noise on the offertory plate, it was a blank I.O.U/cheque/£note.
Who's Graham Kendrick?
Yes, God blessed me with the spiritual gift of laziness
Bugger! (Oh, I forgot, I have said that one in Church, several times...)
Yes, God blessed me with the spiritual gift of earthiness
Matt Redmond? Isn't he that kiddies TV presenter or something like that?
The Devil exists.
Hell.
Who chose those hymns?
Actually, if you admitted to not recycling or being Republican in my parish, you'd find yourself politely exorcised.
Actually I think you'd get away with all of those in our church - except Grahams (above) Matt Redman one seeing as he started the church! Probably most people in our church would find it hard to contain their excitement at someone professing any issues that may require prayer/discussion/mopping up of tears/casting out evil spirits... ;)
redx
lol - Red, could you say that the evil spirits thing is silly?
yes of course you could say it - you would just be pointed to the nearest 'living free' course... ;)
I think you could see very nearly all of them in my church; and I have said several of them from the pulpit in my time....
I think you could say pretty much all of those at the church I attend, too. Plus we are blessed with a slightly batty and rather deaf elderly woman who does the sermon/hymn criticism at high volume!
'I've been abused'
I'm not so sure. I have been to a few (open) evangelical churches where such a "sharing" would automatically give you star status.
But it would certainly be well out of order in the better class of church.
Most of these would be perfectly OK at my church; we're all more or less left-wing, for instance, and I've said several times that I was abused. We had the Qur'an read at our wedding as well. I think 'I masturbate' would be too much for most people, but we don't usually talk publicly about doing it in the missionary position with our lawfully wedded spouses either!
Let's face it, Robert, saying "I masturbate" in any public setting would have you thrown out of England. It's just not the done thing.
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